Blah--What? Two posts in one day?

Did you ever go to the doctor feeling fine and come out feeling horrible?  Last Thursday I had a stomach endoscopy by a really nice doctor.  Well, I thought he was nice.  I had virtually no symptoms, now I've got 'em for gastritis and GERD! Then I added insult to injury by looking on the internet for information.  Now I really feel bad!  Actually, I'm feeling as good as can be expected.  Honestly I thought I was too laid back to have these stress-related disorders.

Apparently, I need to do some in-depth examination to see what I'm not doing right and what the heck I'm doing wrong to bring on this bad stuff.  But, wasn't it in-depth stuff that got me here in the first place?

How about an appeal for deliverance, "Therefore my spirit is overwhelmed within me;  my heart within me is distressed?" Psalm 143:4; and then in Psalm 131:1, "Lord, my heart is not haughty, nor my eyes lofty.  Neither do I concern myself with great matters, nor with the things too profound for me."

If I must not concern myself with great matters nor with things too profound for me--although if it applies to you that's fine too...Having read and said that:  I need to make a commitment to stop watching TV, reading too many books, writing too many books (obviously even one would be too much, since I haven't written any:  Ecc. 12:12), trying to figure out economics and politics, trying to figure out the mind of a woman...Oh, oops, that would bring me right back to me when I'm not s'posed to concern myself with anything profound~~Ohhh, I'm getting dizzy.

There you have it.  Already, I'm weary of having just said as much or as little as possible without getting into some kind of philosophy or theology of what it means to be alive or a woman.  So, do I or do I not concern myself?

"Surely I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with his/her mother;  like a weaned child is my soul within me."  Ps. 131:2.   If  only...

If only I would simplify my life by getting rid of stuff (mostly books) and the idea that I need to be concerned with things too lofty for me, and do my duties as a woman without thought or complaint, not only my life, but the lives of those around me would be simpler, right?

If only I could get a grip.  I'm 65, feeble and frail, synonym intended, and still haven't got figured out why I'm here.  Or, I've been in rebellion for almost a hundred years.  If only someone would tell me why I'm still around, although I've been tugged in several different directions--too bad I've only got 2 hands and 2 feet.

While I'm entertaining the "if onlies" I've gotta get away from this perplexing situation and indulge in some of that everyday busy-ness of making meals, doing laundry, washing dishes, cleaning up after myself, my man, and a couple of useless house cats.  Altho' the cats are a nice soft landing for banging my head when I have a day like today.  Poor kitties.  Innocent animals often have the big job of being sympathizers to ruthless humans.

Praise the Lord

I'm doing cartwheels, hand-stands, head-stands and yelling "praise the Lord," every opportunity I have.  And if you believe this, you believe in miracles.  Now, that wasn't so hard was it--to believe in miracles?  Of course, if you know me you'll know how impossible it really is for me to do all these things, except praise the Lord, and some of you might even have your doubts about that when you've seen ?me on a really bad day.

We are experiencing beautiful weather here in Central Kansas.  Daytime temps in the 70's, nighttime in the 50's.  It looks as if we're going to have to get out our sweaters and jackets.  Probably not as Kansas weather has a reputation for being willy-nilly.  Really!  We could possibly see another 3-digit-temperature day or week, but the current heat-cycle totaling over 50 days of 100-plus degrees has been broken.

Temps in the 70's, low 80's, is feeling just right.

Another Come-Back

Hi, to anyone who has been faithful to check and see if I've made it back from my chasm of grief.  I thought I would change the look of my blog just to remind myself and others that I'm here...again.

I've not been alone because God has been with me, even when I wasn't sure.  He IS faithful.

Since my sister died last March, we attended an uncle's funeral just three or four days after my sis's.  He lead a long, rich life on his farm.  He died after barely a year in the nursing home.

Since then we said farewell to three cousins.  My uncle and three cousins were all from my mother's family.  I was beginning to wonder what the Lord is trying to tell me.  But then I remembered that at last count, many years ago, I listed at least 50 first cousins from both my mother's and father's families.  Quite a few of us are still living, and we're all getting older.

So why should I wonder at these multiple deaths?  It will be sometime before the final earthly pages have been written for all of us.  One last uncle from my maternal side, and an aunt from the paternal side are still living.  I grew up rich in family relationships and annual reunions, and a plethora of memories.

Recently I've been meeting with one of my double cousins.  We had grown apart by miles, by raising kids, and by jobs.  But now that we're both mostly retired from working outside the home we have more time...well, a little more time, to get together and share our memories, some of which are mutual, and many of which we individually experienced  differently.  Our relatedness runs deep because her mother and father were sister and brother to my parents (in case you wondered what a double cousin is).

Perhaps I will share some of these memories here for my grandchildren to find someday.  But for now, I have to run because a couple of those grandkids are coming to spend the afternoon and I have to prepare a light dinner for this evening.

Hoping to be back soon.

Easter

The Saturday before Easter  (23rd) we went to our oldest granddaughter's soccer game.  She certainly has fun being mostly-the-goalee, but she has a mean kick too.  We took younger brother with us.  He was mostly on my lap, hiding his face and hands from the chilly wind.  It was pretty cold, and I was so glad I wore my winter coat instead of the spring jacket I thought would be warm enough.
For lunch we met with my niece from Las Vegas--she was working at her mom's house this past week, painting and putting up new curtains, refreshing it for a renter. I certainly admire her for getting around so soon after her mom's, my sister's,  death.  She flew home later in the afternoon to be at home with her family for Easter.
We got manipulated into staying for supper with Amy and family, when she said it was waffle and sausage night.  Now, her waffles are the best, and the German sausage is made in Hillsboro, KS.  It's not spicy, but has a smoked flavor like a lot of us around the area grew up with when our parent's did their own butchering.
It was so unusual not to have my family's annual Easter get together.  There aren't that many of us  in this area anymore, and we had all just been together for our sister's funeral.  Our daughter and her family came to our house.  This was Baby Abigail's first big outing--going to  church, coming here for dinner, and letting her parents shop at Walmart for necessities.
The girls were so cute in their matching dresses, with Easter hats for Alana and April.  April is so cute in what she says:   In church she asked her mom, "What in the world is going on here?"  For while she was telling me, "I've got an idea."  or "I've got a plan."  Never found out what the idea or plan was.
Our dinner was baked ham and baked potatoes, Black Cherry jello with applesauce for filling, Zwiebach (two-bun rolls), roasted corn cobs,  and Spring decorated cake for dessert. I made it easy by not making the traditional Graham Cracker Fluff.   Our son, Mark, and Tammy couldn't make it from Topeka.  They took Tammy's mom out so she could have some away-time from the nursing home where she's recovering from a stroke.
I've been having problems loading pictures.  I'll try and see what I can do.  It used be so easy to use the Picasa program for the blog, but after the changes made here Picasa doesn't seem to work as well.  Or at all!